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| Yeah, it looks pretty fucking incredible. Even if you don't own a VCR anymore. |
Not only do you get that Sweet-ass Green VHS tape housed inside a "Hard Clamshell". You also get that big ass box with Toxie on it, and get this... "ALL OF THEM ARE SIGNED BY LLOYD KAUFMAN!"
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| Fuck yeah! Lloyds Autograph on a Toxic Avenger Big Box. Sounds too good to be true... |
This is where the first problem pops up. There is no autograph anywhere to be found on mine. Seems to be that nobody who ordered this has received a signed copy. This is absolute false advertising...and although it is a bummer, it isn't even the tip of the fucking iceberg...
Whoever works in Tromas Shipping department should be fired. They decided to ship these big boxes in Padded envelopes, rather than boxes. Normally this wouldn't be too big of a deal, but the clamshell inside of the big box is significantly smaller then the Big box itself. Check this out so you can get an idea of what I'm talking about:
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| The Clamshell case should fit snugly inside. This one is loose and moves around quite a bit inside. |
You might still be wondering why this is such a big deal. Maybe you think I'm just being a prick. But check this out...The fact that there was so much wiggle room inside of the box coupled with the tight padded envelope they shipped it in resulted in my VHS arriving looking like this:
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| Front Cover. Mid way across the top. Box was crushed and is creased. |
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| Top Flap. Numerous spiderweb crushes and creases. |
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| Back cover. Bottom left Side. Hard crush caused the clamshell inside to warp. |
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| Bottom back cover and side spine. Not only was the box crushed, the bottom flap was bent back slightly and the glue was beginning to separate. Had to repair this with Glue-stick. |
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| Another shot of the front cover. This one shows the damage a bit more. |
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| Back cover. Hard crease and fraying along the edge of the box. |
This is completely unacceptable. I understand that Sometimes damages occur during shipping, but this could have been prevented had they used boxes rather than envelopes. This is 100 percent Tromas fault. This might not be so surprising or irritating had this been a 20 year old VHS copy purchased off amazon for 5 bucks. But this is a brand new item, purchased direct from the Studio...for 38 dollars a piece.
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| Sure fucking feels that way... |
It is completely beyond unreasonable to expect a consumer to accept an item in this condition. I would have looked past the Typos on the back cover, the wasted spine space, and the cheap flimsy clamshell they used. I wouldn't have even cared that they used a really shitty master to duplicate these. This is seriously the worst I have ever seen this movie look and sound. But more on that in a minute. I would have looked past all of this once I saw that sweet image of Toxie staring back at me from the front of a Big Box. But instead, I look at it and feel anger. I feel cheated, lied to, and ripped off. It's hard to look past the negatives, when there doesn't seem to be any positives. Maybe "NO positives" is a bit extreme. The color of the VHS is awesome, and the "you must purchase this tape if this label is broken" sticker was a nice touch. But other than that, it's hard to be happy with this release.
Aside from the Cheap, undersized clamshells and damaged Big boxes... There is also the contents of the tape itself. Now, The tape looks awesome. It is a nice green which really does remind you of toxic waste. This is cool, but not cool enough to make up for the shitty transfer. I don't know where they obtained the master tape used to duplicate these VHS, but it looks and sounds like shit. The first thing I noticed was the bass missing from the music during the films spoken introduction. It is simply not there for a few seconds. Right about the time we see the title card drop into place, you will notice the washed out colors that will persist throughout this release. In general, this release looks bad. The most notable moment is during the scenes where we first see melvin interact with the bullies. The water in the spa blends together and appears as a white blotch on screen. Also, during the Head Crushing scene, Colors are too dark and make parts of the scene difficult to view. Most notable in this scene is the shot of the polaroids the girls take after they have killed the kid. The color and blurriness make the photos difficult to interpret.
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| This Release actually gives you, the viewer a chance to experience what it is like to have your eyes poked by the toxic avenger! Just like in the movie!! |
This release is sure to disappoint just about everyone. The only redeeming factor here is the Vintage interview tossed in before the movie starts. However, as cool as that footage was... it only confirms that troma did indeed select a shitty master to duplicate these from, because the interview footage is actually higher quality than the movie itself! It appears in typical VHS quality, with decent sound. Then the film starts and it all goes to shit. This bugs me because it implies a certain lack of concern for quality. Which, coupled with the shitty shipping choice... makes for a product which comes across feeling as nothing more than a shitty Cashgrab for Troma. However, in typical Troma fashion...corners were cut, which resulted in a shitty realization of a great idea.
My advise to Troma: Next time you guys wanna release a VHS, make sure that the Clamshell fits the box snugly. Exercise some caution when selecting a master tape, and for fucks sake send the fucking things out in BOXES!
My advise to you: If you are a Toxie or Troma collector who is thinking about buying this...DONT!! It will only piss you off and make you feel cheated. Instead, why not hit up ebay and pick up a nice "Battle for Tromaville" Board game, or a Original Lightning Video VHS release. IF you are just now discovering The Toxic Avenger and you think this is something you want to pick up....Dont!! Head on over to amazon and pick up a copy of the Troma collectors Edition on VHS. It is the best release of this movie to ever come out on VHS and it wont leave you feeling like you want to toss it right out of a window into a vat of Toxic Chemical Waste.
